More and more, these patterns are affecting our relationships.
Because when people don’t have it, they really miss it.
A guy who just had an affair really misses his wife and would love to be back with her talking about trivial things.” This concept can be hard to swallow when the love media portrays seems more desirable than what is experienced in reality.
How does one navigate these uncharted waters and discern what real, healthy marriages and romantic relationships should look like?
The root of any romance today is love, but it wasn’t always so.
“Sex was a struggle when my wife and I first got married,” says Danny Jenkins, who’s 27 and recently married. At the same time, I had this idea from movies and the church that sex would be an erotic fantasy when it did happen.
It was confusing in our first year of marriage to understand that sex was ‘good,’ but that it wasn’t just automatically mind-blowing like the media tells us.It’s become such a problem that some have begun to refer to this mediated view of romance as “emotional pornography”—insinuating that popular expressions of love and romance rewire the brain in ways that recall the damage done by visual pornography.Just as visual pornography sets up unrealistic expectations for sex and physicality, the media’s fanciful stories of love wire consumers to expect Hollywood-style kisses in the rain and constant, epic moments of dramatic love. “One of the things that [has] struck me is the formative power of consumerism,” says Mark Powley, author of and co-founder of the Breathe network.But there’s more to love than just excitement—there’s also God-given purpose.“Your life as a believer in Christ is to strategically give yourself away for the Kingdom of God,” says Paul Sorensen, the executive director and founder of the Greenwich Center of Hope and Renewal.“We are shaped in ways that reach beyond our shopping habits.