Coincidentally, Adam is also neighbors with Ben and Miri.
I've only seen Ben once, fleetingly, in the market. It's the most overtly sexual life choice I've ever made, and it's fun. Or rather, like an immature asshole, I stopped returning text messages.I could tell he saw me too, in a moment of passing. And while Ben is congenial, and perfectly pleasant, I start to get the feeling that he's a little bored. After each date, I feel the urge to call someone, to tell them what I just did, to brag. I am less sure that I want to be Ben's entertainment when Miri isn't home, however. From anyone else, this would elicit an eye-roll from me, but it rings with the tenor of truth from him. I'm emboldened by my ability to get what I want, and it translates to how Adam and I sleep together, too. It wasn't, I learned, the threesomes that I most craved. It only took two unanswered texts before I never heard from them again.They may have been small cabbage whites, rather than huge wing-beating swallowtails, but I did have butterflies in my stomach. There's a circular bed under one of the bay windows. On the windowsill next to me, my tea casts a shadow on the glass. Nor do I completely understand the reason for having the circular bed in their living room. He was curious about the mechanics of our encounters, down to the smallest detail, and not for the reasons I initially suspected. Ultimately, I learned, it was his way of trying to understand my desires. Once you take marriage vows, you have what a sacred sanctity.
However, with up to 50 percent of all marriages ending in divorce, that's not exactly the case anymore—and online dating platform is well aware of this fact.
Not that we're blaming them, these couples are aware of the choices they're making and the consequences that come with these decisions.
The fact that there's actually a market for married people in online dating baffles us a little.
To face the truth of my own cravings, and to make the fulfillment of them manifest in the world -- even just to speak to them, to call them by their name.
And this new skill has made my ability to handle a wholly honest relationship with Adam attainable.
Recently, a social dating network called the Asian Dinner Club introduced a new service, setting up "surprise dream dates" for married couples (with each other, I hasten to add – not some kind of wife-swapping experiment). Home is, of course, wonderful but it's more about tea and The Archers than a fluttering kaleidoscope of colour.